Terri Cole: Stop Trying to Fix Everyone. Signs You’re a High-Functioning Codependent and How to Break the Cycle

What does it really mean to help someone, and where do we draw the line? In this episode of A Really Good Cry, I sit down with the incredible Terri Cole, a psychotherapist whose own life experiences offer a profound look into the world of high-functioning codependency. Terri shares an unforgettable story about the night she brought a stranger home from the train station—a gesture that sparks our exploration into the blurred lines between helping and interfering.  Join us as we delve into the psychological impacts of codependency, discussing how our desires to help can sometimes control both our lives and those around us. Terri provides crucial insights on recognizing when empathy exceeds healthy limits and the vital importance of establishing boundaries for our well-being.  If you’ve ever found yourself in the role of a rescuer, or if you’re seeking to understand the emotional intricacies of codependency, this heartfelt discussion is not to be missed.   What We Discuss: 00:00 Intro 00:56 Bringing home a stranger 03:13 What is high functioning codependency? 06:02 Signs of an HFC 07:47 The line between helping and controlling 11:14 How to support without overstepping 15:59 The power of asking expansive questions 18:30 The burden of being 'nice' 20:47 Breaking the cycle of auto advice-giving 25:20 Letting someone be their own hero 28:03 Why parents should let kids fail sometimes 39:05 Asking before giving advice 43:20 How projection affects our relationships 46:07 Why asking for help feels so hard 52:26 How to stop tying worth to helping others 58:09 Stop caring what others think 1:02:18 Showing up the same online and offline 1:07:40 The cost of perfectionism 1:12:25 How to truly rest your mind and body   Follow Terri: https://www.terricole.com/ https://www.instagram.com/terricole/ https://www.youtube.com/@terri_cole https://www.tiktok.com/@terri_cole Follow Radhi: https://www.instagram.com/radhidevlukia/ https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCxWe9A4kMf9V_AHOXkGhCzQ https://www.facebook.com/radhidevlukia1/ https://www.tiktok.com/@radhidevlukia See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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This podcast won’t solve all your problems, but it WILL go through them with you. Radhi Devlukia brings you a new weekly show called A Really Good Cry, a space where we can embrace the real, the messy and the beautiful parts of life that can be difficult to digest alone, together. Tune in for a good ole’ laugh, maybe shed a tear or two, and join a community where you can have a really good cry! There's no small talk here, we are diving straight in and it’s gonna get real. Whether it’s raw, unfiltered conversations, debate and discussions of different perspectives and life experiences or going on an emotional rollercoaster. A Really Good Cry is there for you to learn, connect, and find comfort together - that allows us to see the world and ourselves with a new perspective.  Some episodes will also feature surprise guests, including celebrities, scientists, experts and more. New episodes drop every Tuesday. Tag @areallygoodcry on Instagram with your best crying face for a chance to be featured on our social media channels. Like, comment and follow @areallygoodcry on Instagram if you want the chance to be featured on episodes. You can also subscribe to get exclusive and bonus content. Radhi will give listeners the opportunity to be part of the show by responding to dms, comments, questions and more.