Understanding Blocked Care with Lisa C. Qualls

Welcome to the Called to Love Podcast! In this episode, I am joined with an incredible guest: Lisa C. Qualls. Lisa is the proud mother of both biological and adopted children, twelve in fact, and is an accomplished author, speaker, and Enneagram coach with TBRI training. Together, we focus on the concept of 'blocked care'—a self-protective mechanism that can hinder emotional connection between parents and children. Lisa shares her personal journey into adoption, the challenges faced, and the development of her ministry aimed at supporting adoptive and foster families. We discuss the neuroscience behind blocked care, signs to recognize it, and the importance of acknowledging these feelings to begin healing and reconnecting with children. Our conversation helps explain the concept of blocked care, its effects on parents, and practical strategies for overcoming it. We discuss the importance of understanding the nervous system, building supportive relationships, and finding hope through simple practices like breath prayer. We emphasize the need for self-care and the significance of recognizing beauty in everyday life as a means to combat feelings of overwhelm and despair. A great and practical technique is “YAHWEH” breathing, because sometimes we simply don’t have words when we are so depleted. Here are a few takeaways: Blocked care is a common experience among adoptive parents.Parents often feel shame for not feeling the love they expected.Acknowledging blocked care is the first step to healing.The Connected Child was a pivotal resource for many adoptive parents.Parenting children with trauma requires ongoing support and education.It's important to find community and resources to navigate the challenges of adoption. Caring for the nervous system is essential for recovery.Simple activities like walking can help regulate the nervous system.Sleep is crucial for managing stress and blocked care.Negativity bias can hinder our ability to see joy and beauty.You can learn more and connect with Lisa C. Qualls with these resources:https://www.lisacqualls.com/https://www.instagram.com/lisacqualls/?hl=enYou can email me your questions about adoption and foster care at somercolbert@gmail.com. I'd love to connect with you on Instagram or send you my monthly newsletter with free resources and first access to episodes and more!

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Whether you seek to add to your family through foster care, private domestic adoption or you are called to travel internationally, every adoption story is uniquely beautiful. Yet, each shares a common language of calling, loss, and hardship. As Christian parents we have a deep desire to love and shepherd our children well, but it can be challenging to navigate loss, trauma and how to best love and guide our adopted children. One thing is for sure, adoption is more than a process, it is an invitation to go on a holy journey with the Lord and with your family. Like any journey, there will be valleys along with mountain tops and battles along with the beauty. The good news is, what the Lord calls you to, He will equip you for. Wherever you are in your journey, Called to Love is here to bring you a weekly dose of encouragement from the practical, clinical, and Biblical perspective along with personal stories from adoptive parents, adult adoptees and advice from various experts to help your family thrive in your journey and continue to say “yes” to your own call to love. Called to Love is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. To find practical and spiritual advice to help you grow into the parent you want to be visit www.ChristianParenting.org