When Recovery Becomes Another Addiction (with Carl Eric Fisher)

Holly talks w/Dr. Carl Erik Fisher, addiction psychiatrist and author of The Urge, about the intersection of narcissism and addiction in our current cultural moment, and the paradox of how recovery culture itself can create new forms of self-obsession and addiction.Key themes discussed: Living through institutional collapse and staying grounded; Anna Lembke's theory that endemic narcissism drives peak addiction; distinguishing between grandiose vs vulnerable narcissism and trait vs process narcissism; how 12-step programs were designed to deflate powerful men's egos but modern recovery often demands constant self-optimization; the difference between false refuges (money, power, status) and true refuges (community, spiritual connection, service); "ontological addiction" as attachment to fixed self-concepts; Carl's forthcoming book on self-control thru various forms of losing control; the need for healthy narcissism vs toxic self-obsession; navigating recovery in era that demands constant self-performance.About Carl Eric FisherCarl Erik Fisher is an addiction physician, bioethicist, person in recovery, and author of The Urge: Our History of Addiction, named one of the best books of the year by The New Yorker and The Boston Globe. His writing has appeared in The New York Times, The Washington Post, The Guardian, and elsewhere. An associate professor at Columbia University, he draws from his academic studies, clinical work, and personal experience to explore addiction, self-control, and flourishing at the Substack newsletter Rat Park.Carl's Substack newsletter: Rat ParkCarl's book: The Urge: Our History of Addiction available at Bookshop.orgCarl's website: carlerikfisher.comCarl's podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/flourishing-after-addiction-with-carl-erik-fisher/id1581713114CreditsOriginal music by Gracie Coates of Gracie and Rachel @graciecoates @gracieandrachel on Instagram, gracieandrachel.comSound engineering, editor: Adam Day, adamdayphotography.comProducer: Holly Whitaker, hollywhitaker.comCo-Producers: Adam DayOriginal art by Misha Handschumacher, cmisha.comSupport the showco-regulation is listener-supported, made possible by us and by you; you can support this podcast by joining our Patreon community patreon.com/coregulation Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Om Podcasten

co-regulation is a podcast hosted by Holly Whitaker (HOME, QUITTED) that creates space for authentic conversations about how we're navigating this period of societal upheaval and profound transition. Through conversations with thinkers, artists, and experts, informed by Holly's perspective on addiction, recovery, and the intersection of personal healing and cultural systems, this show invites listeners into real-time exploration of how we're living through unprecedented change—not as isolated individuals, but as interconnected beings whose nervous systems regulate better together than apart.In the aftermath of the 2024 election and accelerating pressure on our social systems, the limitations of the American experiment have become impossible to ignore. Every day exposes the myth that we can solve collective problems through individual achievement, consumption choices, or personal virtue. We've inherited a story that places the burden of global salvation on our individual shoulders while the architects of collapse profit from the fallout.co-regulation emerges from Holly's direct experience: when consumed by the pressure to fix broken systems personally, she becomes incapacitated. Her nervous system remains in perpetual fight-or-flight. But when she connects with others wrestling with the same questions, something shifts. Our bodies literally calm in each other's presence. Solutions emerge not from heroic individual efforts but from the space between us.This podcast acknowledges that we're at the end of an era defined by extraction, dominance, competition, and separation. We're being forced to move toward each other—to find collective solutions, to rebuild ways of existing harmoniously with the earth and each other. The path forward isn't through competition or meritocracy but through connection, mutual aid, and collective sense-making. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.