235: Master the art of saying NO

INTRO:Hey, thanks for tuning in to the Corporate Yogi podcast, I’m your host Julie Zuzek. This pod is YOUR dedicated time for growth, developing practical tools to use with your team and other relationships and to learning deeply about who you are and what makes you tick! Because you are a brilliant and powerful being and I want you to invest more time reflecting on WHO are being, not just WHAT you are doing. Doing is awesome, but BEING, well that is where the magic happens and what makes you truly feel fulfilled. You’re going to love this episode.  So, here’s a look at what you’re going to learn today1 – In the first segment you’’ll learn why we struggle to say NO2 – Then in the second segment you’ll learn the correlation between yes and NO3 – And in the last segment you’ll learn tips to say NOSo get out of your head, into your heart and let’s dive right in, shall we.   SEGMENT 1  I know that some of you don’t struggle with saying NO, and that is awesome. Give yourself a pat on the back!But for the rest of us, especially those of us who suffer from the disease to please, saying NO is a muscle that we have to build. And what is the best way to build a muscle?a) Avoid using it at all costsb) Use it all the time, no matter how scared you are, no matter how messy it is and focus on building the behaviour not being attached to the results.I hope you guessed B, and that’s a little Tough love for you today. I know when we’re scared or when we don’t like doing something, we avoid it at all costs. But sadly this doesn’t get us anywhere. When we avoid something we NEVER, ever ever get better at it, right? Do we? But if we try it, and keep trying it, we’ll get better at it, and it will get easier, I guarantee it. Remember that wayne gretsky quote, we fail at 100% of the shots we don’t take. Do you remember when we talked about the Hard Epidemic? The Hard Epidemic happens when we label something “Hard” in an excuse to avoid doing it. Well I think this is a good time to remind ourselves about the epidemic, because I think it really applies to this example of saying NO. It’s not hard, it’s just new. Saying NO is a perfect example of mindset, and how we need to master ours.So there’s a few reasons why we struggle with saying NO:- First the disease to please. We have that image consultant saboteur worrying about what people are thinking about us. But I guarantee you, they’re not thinking about you anywhere near as much as you think they are. Chances are, they’re just thinking about themselves. So, you’ve gotta let that go.- Second, It’s a little hit of happiness. we really authentically want to help and say the Yes, because it feels good. We’re going to do something new and exciting, maybe we’re going to make someone else happy in the process. It just feels good. But I’m going to let you in on a secret. Saying NO can also feel equally good and very powerful. I promise you!- Thirdly, We’re in a routine or don’t know we have an option. And this is really simple and obvious but sometimes we’re just completely in a routine of saying yes right away or we’re in a rut of saying Yes, and we don’t realize we have options. So this is a good opportunity for you to check in, take an inventory and see if there’s anything you are doing out of obligation.- Lastly, We lack the tools. If saying NO is an underdeveloped muscle for you, then I’m going to help you out and give you some great tools that will help you dive in and get started. Don’t you worry, I’ve got you covered. SEGMENT 2   We’ll look at the relationship between yes and no.I want you to think about Yes and No as being 2 sides of a coin – and they are directly correlated, because remember,...

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Designed for conscious leaders building extraordinary teams, the Corporate Yogi podcast spreads practical leadership advice fused with ancient spiritual wisdom. Julie is a mentor, a muse and visionary. You'll learn from her wisdom and be inspired by her authenticity. This podcast is the curation of lessons learned from Julie’s high-performance coaching clients. As a highly sought-after leadership coach, Julie works with leaders at major corporations including RBC, Deloitte, BMO, PwC, Facebook, Kellogg Schulich, Canadian Tire, Google, and Visa. She is a highly respected expert in the business community and believes that Monday morning should be more exciting than Friday afternoon. This podcast takes a fresh approach to leadership development – it’s not your typical HBR or Ivy league philosophical approach. It leads with an angle of personal development, personal leadership, Business transformational, and team leadership, infused with many personal stories that are cheeky, relevant, and fun. Julie is dedicated to building workplace cultures that employees actually brag about and helps clients with Leadership Excellence, Career Planning, Transition, Self-Reflection, Personal Development, Personal Brand Building, Employee Engagement and Retention Strategies. In this podcast you will learn about Julie’s proprietary system called the Inner Design Method which helps you understand WHO you really are and WHAT you truly want. This powerful, intensive method uses personal development and reflection tools to unlock deep levels of awareness and personal connection. Topics within the method include discovery of Core Values, defining a Life Purpose Statement, Life Design Process (Reflect, Future and Present), Relationship Design Tools, Change Design Tools, the Belief Design Process, Identifying Key Saboteurs and their Core Messages, Trust Model and Team Theory, Growth Mindset Model and Leadership Legacy. Popular topics from the podcast focus on growth mindset Vs fixed mindset, nurturing a Growth Hangover, living within a Comfort Zone Vs a Stretch Zone, how to build a Personal Leadership Brand and get comfortable with self-promotion. You’ll also discover what your Leadership Blind spots are, establish your Leadership Legacy and build trust with your team and understand how the trust model works. You’ll learn how to avoid the biggest hiring mistakes and tools to get out of the weeds and give away your LEGO. Other leadership tools include creating a Designed Alliance and designing a team offsite to use these Peak Experiences with your team to champion change and build trust with your team and use different models for change adoption. Understanding how to work with introverts and extraverts on your team, and the benefits of infusing coaching skills and techniques into your leadership by asking powerful questions and leverage Emotional Intelligence, IQ, PQ and EQ. Other great leadership topics include receiving feedback via a 360 Review report, giving effective and timely feedback, saying NO and setting boundaries and avoiding areas of self-sabotage like Imposter Syndrome, the Spotlight Effect and Pedestal Complex. The podcast also features valuable lessons from relevant books and authors like Gay Hendricks, Simon Sinek, Seth Godin, Susan Scott, Brene Brown, Gary Keller, Brian Tracy, and of course classic books like Good to Great from Jim Collins and How to Win Friends and Influence People from Dale Carnegie.