6 Things I Wished I Didn’t Worry About as a New Father | Dudes to Dads Podcast Ep 212

Being a new father is awesome, but along with the awesome, comes some stress and worrying. Granted, I was a little more uptight than most dads, but if If I look back on my own experience when i was a new father, there are definitely some things that I wish I wasn't as concerned with. So in this episode, I'm going to share with you 6 things that new fathers should't worry about. You have enough things to worry about as a new father.  Here are some things you should check off your list and not be concerned with: 1) Bonding with the baby - I had some pretty high expectations of how I would bond with the baby when I was a new father.  I was pretty worried because of my expectations. As it turns out, I didn't start to feel close for a few months after our child was born.   If the mother is spending a lot more time with the child than you and is breastfeeding, then new fathers may not bond with the baby for a little while. It's ok. 2) Perfect Photos - You will find yourself as a new father making funny faces, noises, and doing anything you can to get that perfect shot. When my son was about 2, we had a huge family photo shoot.  Grandparents, everyone.  My son just didn't want to cooperate.  We used a cup full of snacks to try and bribe him. Every time we took the snacks away, he cried and made a fuss.  I was so stressed out and upset that he wouldn't cooperate.  Finally my mother turns to me and says, don't worry about, just let him hold the snacks.  We can try to edit it out but if we can't who cares. I look back at those pictures now and realize how me getting upset was a waste of energy. 3) Saying No - Whether it's people wanting to come visit you, people asking you to come visit them, or events that you are invited to.  Don't worry about saying no as a new father. You can't please everyone.  You want to make sure you are taking care of yourself, along with you and your family. 4) Messing Up - You are going to mess up...a lot.  So just accept it and stop worrying about it. As a new father messing up is just part of the gig.  We all do it.  Just try to learn from your mistakes and not repeat them (too much). 5) Development Stages - Your wife may tell you that her friends baby rolled over at this age or sat up at that age.  Don't worry about it.  All children develop at different times. Of course if you see significant delays or problems, you may want to have the pediatrician check out the child just to be safe, but in most cases, the child is just developing at a different speed.  It's ok. 6) That You Are Good Enough - Here's the deal.  If you never were told this by your parents, friends, or spouse, I'm telling you now...you are good enough.  You can do this and know you will be an awesome father.

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Getting married and having kids is quite different than being a single dude. Not only does your available free time change, but your stress level increases, the pressure escalates, and we often don't have an outlet for help. The average woman has a circle of friends, family, or online communities where she shares aspects of her life and gets advice, feedback, or at a minimum, the feeling that there are other people going through the same thing. Men don't talk as much, don't want to share as much, and therefore don't really experience the transition the way women do. Our personal struggles and frustrations often go untouched, simply learning how to cope with them ourselves. We think we need to "man up" and deal with it on our own. Whether it is parenting issues, dealing with our relationships, or anything in-between, Dad University is a place where men can know that other guys are going through the same thing. We can help each other and be better fathers and husbands. The Podcast helps dads through the journey of fatherhood as well as provides advice and assistance in relationships.