Defensiveness vs Gaslighting - What’s the Difference & How to Stop Both: Episode 362

It’s important for all of us to admit that we have defensive mechanisms and that we do get defensive with our partners at times. Let’s allow ourselves some grace here. Many of you would probably relate to getting even more defensive about getting defensive! It is common to go on the offensive through deflection or blame, which can leave another feeling that their experience is being invalidated. However that does not mean that someone is being gaslighted. Gaslighting is a much more serious pattern when it is happening, and is a strong accusation to make that can quickly escalate a conversation or conflict. In this episode you will hear the clear distinction between defensiveness and gaslighting so that you can use the terms properly and reduce escalation. By the end of the episode you will hear 6 different actions to take to reduce both defensiveness and gaslighting in your relations. Both of these lead to erosion of connection, love, and emotional closeness.    Relationship Resources: Join one of the 30 Day Couples Challenges starting Oct 1st, 2024 - select either one with this link: https://www.meetthefreemans.com/challenges. Or see the individual details below:  Level 1 details: “Prioritizing Us” is focused on strengthening your connection, communication, and fun “Love Deposit” ideas. LINKED HERE Level 2 details : “Rebuilding Us” is focused on repairing and rebuilding after a harder season of marriage. LINKED HERE

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Stay on the same team, no matter the challenge you face! Jocelyn and Aaron Freeman, known as The Freemans, are the husband-and-wife duo behind viral marriage content seen by 20M+ couples every month. Both hold Master’s degrees in Psychology, are authors, coaches, and parents... but what makes them stand out is how real and relatable their advice is. Most couples say: “Are they watching us?!” This show gives couples the practical tools, real talk, and honest coaching that most relationships are missing. Whether you're in a tough season or just want to stay connected through the chaos of life, you'll walk away from every episode with something you can actually use. If you're ready to improve communication, resolve conflict faster, and feel emotionally connected again, subscribe now. You’ll want to binge past episodes and never miss what’s next.