Preparing your mindset for birth

Getting into the right mindset for birth is something that is often talked about. We're often hearing people say "Birth is mind over matter" and that's because it's true! So I wanted to dig a bit deeper into understanding what a great mindset for birth was and I've a great guest to help me.

On the podcast today, I'm joined by Ulf Sandstrom who is a mental trainer and hypnocoach who also happens to be a co-founder of the Hypnobirthing Society of Sweden. Doesn't he sound like the perfect guest to help us to better understand the best kind of mindset for birth and how we might go about achieving that?



During my conversation with Ulf, we talk about many aspects of mindset for birth because quite frankly he has so much to share. He's also very generously created some free downloads to go with our chat and help you to take some of the things we talk about further. See below for more details!



Here are just some of the things that we talked about...
How dads can play an active role during birth
Hypnobirthing places a great emphasis on the importance of dads during pregnancy and birth and Ulf shares some of the ways that he encourages dads to get involved including;

Helping mum to relax during pregnancy by reading relaxation scripts to her. This has the added benefit of the baby learning to associate dad with being a calming influence THIS TIP IS GOLD-RATED**!! Why? Because once baby is here, dad will have a hugely calming influence on the baby which will not only help mum but help dad to feel super-involved with the little one. What's great about this is that both of you are doing something practical, that gets results AND that can be used afterwards.
Be a gatekeeper to all aspects of the birth where thought is required. This helps mum to stay focused on birthing.
Helping mum get back to calm place during birth by using some tools and techniques he has learned during the pregnancy.

His advice to dads is this; Think of yourself as a sommelier at a top-notch restaurant and come from a place of service.

**Now, not only is this dad-tip GOLD RATED, but he's also created a dad-script exclusively for you my podcast listeners. How fabulous is that? To find out how to get yours - see below.
How to handle your fears
If you’re afraid of something that hasn’t happened yet, it’s because you’re imagining what it’s going to be like. perhaps you read it, saw it or heard about it. Or perhaps you have a vivid imagination that prefers to look at possible dangers.

Ulf reminds us that "if you develop a fear or a phobia, it’s not your will; it's a response by your nervous system" and that a fear isn't any less difficult for someone than a trauma based on something that's actually happened.
"If you’re afraid of something that hasn’t happened yet, it’s because you’re imagining what it’s going to be like"
Ulf shares a great exercise which is great for both mums and dads. Write down anything you’re afraid of about the birth - or post birth. You don't need to share it with each other. Once you've written your fears down, set fire to the paper. Setting fire to your fears like this can be really powerful; it can help you not only to acknowledge and accept your fears but also to feel like you've voiced them as well as helping you to let them go.
Getting into the mindset for birth
Ulf says this on getting into a mindset for birth; "The more luggage you can lose before birth the better". I love how he uses the term "luggage"; I use the term head trash, but we're talking about the same thing. It's all that emotional baggage that can prevent you from being totally present during birth but can also kick off mental processes that could bring on anxiety or fear which could directly impact labour. BUT... and it's a big BUT!

Om Podcasten

The Fear Free Childbirth podcast is for parents-to-be who want to take the fear out of pregnancy, birth and beyond. The show is a mix of real-life positive stories, experts sharing their wisdom and Alexia sharing psychology insights to help you to get into a fearless mindset. Mindset is a key aspect that can help to you have a positive experience with all three, and it all starts with preparing for pregnancy and childbirth. One of the biggest fears parents-to-be face is the fear of the unknown. This is where this show can help. By learning more about what to expect, and how to handle it, you can lose one the fear and embrace the journey. It all started when Alexia experienced her first miscarriage and felt relief; she knew something was amiss. She had tokophobia, the extreme fear of pregnancy and birth, which is pretty terrifying. To help her cope with her pregnancy and the thought of the birth, Alexia developed a technique to get rid of her fears and anxieties. She went on to have two amazing births and she now teaches this technique to others that they too can overcome their fears and have the life they want. What started as a maternity leave project, is now an essential resource with tens of thousands now listening to Alexia’s podcast each month as they seek to lose The Fear and prepare for pregnancy, birth and motherhood. The podcast is credited with helping thousands of women around the world in having a positive birth experience. A empowered birth experience is the best way to start the parenting journey because it infuses you with strength and resilience. Alexia is the developer of the healing modality Head Trash Clearance, a coach, speaker, trainer and author of the books “Fearless Birthing: Clear your fears for a positive birth” and “Clear Your Head Trash: How to create clarity, peace and confidence in your life and work”. She works privately with people from all over the world, as well as supporting them with her online products and programs. Fear Free Childbirth is the online destination for women seeking to take the fear out of pregnancy and birth with fear-clearance meditations, online fear-clearance courses, professional training and specialist programs for overcoming tokophobia. Find out more at FearFreeChildbirth.com and Fearless-Birthing.com