Why the ‘winging it’ birth plan sucks, with Shalome Stone

Today I'm thrilled to be joined on the podcast by Shalome Stone from Rockstar Birth Magazine.

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When Shalome and I first chatted, it took us a while to figure out what we'd focus on for our pocast chat because we could've had spoken on a whole range of stuff around birth. But once I'd spoken to her for a bit, I knew what it was. Shalome was telling me about her own journey into birth work and what sparked her interest, which for her it was her own crappy first birth experience. Shalome approached her first birth with confidence just believing that because she was a woman she would be fine, she "had all the bits" after all. Basically, she went with the 'winging it' strategy, otherwise known as "going with the flow".

Things didn't pan out all that great for her, which you can hear all about in the podcast. When the time came round for baby number two, she knew she had to do things differently. She knew that this time around she would need to do her homework and prepare. If you've been listening to the podcast, you'll know that I keep banging on about the need to prepare for your birth. This preparation is might include things like;

educating yourself about birth and the birthing process
learning about the birth choices you have and the decisions you might face
finding out about the birthing professionals that are available to support you in the lead-up and following your birth
doing emotional work if you have fears, anxieties or worries that you need support with
mental preparation to help you find toold and techniques that can help you to stay focussed and positive on the day
physical preparation in terms of exercises to strengthen your body for birth

Phew! Not a bad list for starters! It can be easy to see why this can seem overwhelming at first. But believe me when I say this; it's worth it. YOU'RE worth it! The thing is, the benefits of preparing aren't immediately obvious, especially for first time mums who have NO IDEA what awaits them.

So, perhaps I can convince you through talking about the impact of NOT PREPARING, and how using the 'winging it' strategy really does suck. As someone who went with the 'winging it' strategy, Shalome is much better placed to tell how much it does indeed suck.

We also talk about budgetting for birth and I ask Shalome "how much should you invest financially in your birth?". She compares our birthing day with other big days in our lives that we spend considerable sums on - namely the wedding, but one thing is clear from our chat. The far-reaching ripple effects of your births mean that investing in your birth is a no brainer.

I hope you enjoy our chat! And listen up for this utterly rockstar quote from Shalome "I don't have a magic vagina"

If you want to track down Shalome here are all the usual links

Website - www.rockstarbirthmagazine.com

Facebook - www.facebook.com/rockstarbirthmagazine

Instagram - @rockstarbirthmag

Podcast - Rockstar Birth Radio

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Om Podcasten

The Fear Free Childbirth podcast is for parents-to-be who want to take the fear out of pregnancy, birth and beyond. The show is a mix of real-life positive stories, experts sharing their wisdom and Alexia sharing psychology insights to help you to get into a fearless mindset. Mindset is a key aspect that can help to you have a positive experience with all three, and it all starts with preparing for pregnancy and childbirth. One of the biggest fears parents-to-be face is the fear of the unknown. This is where this show can help. By learning more about what to expect, and how to handle it, you can lose one the fear and embrace the journey. It all started when Alexia experienced her first miscarriage and felt relief; she knew something was amiss. She had tokophobia, the extreme fear of pregnancy and birth, which is pretty terrifying. To help her cope with her pregnancy and the thought of the birth, Alexia developed a technique to get rid of her fears and anxieties. She went on to have two amazing births and she now teaches this technique to others that they too can overcome their fears and have the life they want. What started as a maternity leave project, is now an essential resource with tens of thousands now listening to Alexia’s podcast each month as they seek to lose The Fear and prepare for pregnancy, birth and motherhood. The podcast is credited with helping thousands of women around the world in having a positive birth experience. A empowered birth experience is the best way to start the parenting journey because it infuses you with strength and resilience. Alexia is the developer of the healing modality Head Trash Clearance, a coach, speaker, trainer and author of the books “Fearless Birthing: Clear your fears for a positive birth” and “Clear Your Head Trash: How to create clarity, peace and confidence in your life and work”. She works privately with people from all over the world, as well as supporting them with her online products and programs. Fear Free Childbirth is the online destination for women seeking to take the fear out of pregnancy and birth with fear-clearance meditations, online fear-clearance courses, professional training and specialist programs for overcoming tokophobia. Find out more at FearFreeChildbirth.com and Fearless-Birthing.com