How to Tell if Someone Will Be a Good Long-Term Partner (and find them)

What if everything we believe about finding love is designed to keep us searching instead of finding? This episode debunks some of the worst common advice and showcases what's genuinely useful. It might start with you. The people most focused on finding the perfect partner often remain alone, while those focused on becoming the right partner tend to attract extraordinary relationships. Shift from scarcity-based dating to abundance-based connection: Understand "optimal search theory" Focus on shared vision for the future rather than identical current interests Recognise that generosity and a growth mindset matter more than initial chemistry If you find someone, will you recognise them when you do? Advertiser - Millionaire Match High-quality, entrepreneurial singles, for serious relationships MillionaireMatch.com Referal code 'GROW' for a welcome treat. NEW SHOW - How to Change the World Sam's new show can be found on major podcast players: Spotify - ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://open.spotify.com/show/1Fj3eFjEoAEKF5lWQxPJyT⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Apple - ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/how-to-change-the-world-the-history-of-innovation/id1815282649⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ YouTube - ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.youtube.com/@HowToChangeTheWorldPodcast⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Can't find it on your player? RSS feed - ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://feeds.acast.com/public/shows/682b3b86696b5d1232d698a8⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ------- UPGRADE to ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Premium⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠: 🏖️ Ad-free listening 🤘 Support the show 🔓 Exclusive AMAs and bonus content 💬 Community Discord ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠GrowthMindset.Supercast.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Get in Touch 👋 Free Call - ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Schedule Link⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ - https://cal.com/samwebster/mindset 📧 Email - GrowthMindsetPodcast (@) gmail,com Growth Mindset Psychology: Sam Webster explores the psychology of happiness, satisfaction, purpose, and growth through the lens of self-improvement. 📺 Watch - ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠YouTube (Growth Mindset)⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ 🛜 Website - ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Growth Mindset⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Show: Growth Mindset, psychology of self-improvement Episode: How to Tell if Someone Will Be a Good Long-Term Partner (and find them) Chapters: 00:00 How to choose a partner 00:51 Importance of shared values 03:21 Know what you really want 05:29 What is the "Optimal Choice" 06:08 Increasing the pool of potential mates 06:57 Go on more dates 08:27 Improving yourself to attract better partners 10:10 4 Mistakes and bad advices when choosing a partner 13:22 4 Dating myths to uncover 19:40 4 Signs to look at when choosing a partner 22:45 Past Relationships 27:06 Screening for a positive mindset 28:42 Optimal Search Theory 31:30 Send off Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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Most self-help advice is guesswork dressed up as wisdom. We dig into psychology, neuroscience, and behavioral science to find what actually changes lives. WHY LISTEN? Over 8 million downloads because we answer the questions that matter: How do I build mental strength? What creates lasting motivation? How can I understand my own mind well enough to work with it, not against it? This podcast is for curious skeptics who want frameworks backed by psychology studies, not Instagram quotes. Whether you're navigating procrastination, building self-discipline, or designing your own philosophy for a life well lived—we explore the hidden psychology behind real change. WHAT YOU'LL GET Mental models and simple techniques from cognitive psychology, positive psychology, and ancient wisdom traditions like Stoicism and Buddhism. Being a human can be confusing, learning about it doesn’t have to be. We cover everything from emotional intelligence and habit formation to brain health and the nervous system. WHAT YOU DON’T GET No pseudoscience. No oversimplified "hacks." No hustle porn. Just practical insights on mindset improvement, self-development, and human psychology that respect your intelligence and mental health. THE APPROACH Instead of telling you what to think, we explore how thinking works. Armed with psychology studies, social science research, and relentless curiosity, we uncover the mechanics of belief change, attitude change, and personal development. Success is personal. You might want to leverage your neurodiverse strengths, build a business, or simply discover how to be happier. We provide the mental frameworks to pursue your definition of success with mental strength and self-care that fits your life. YOUR HOST I'm Sam Webster Harris—a lifelong learner with ADHD and an obsession with finding answers to hard questions. After launching businesses, traveling the world, and nearly dying a few times, I concluded that psychology and science are where real wisdom lives. This show is my excuse to dive deep into health and fitness research, behavioral psychology, and cool science while helping you build genuine self-discipline and motivation. PREMIUM Go ad-free and access exclusive content, AMAs, and our community Discord. Growth Mindset Premium PAST SERIES Previous guests include Olympians, Scientists, Billionaires, and Sam's Mum. Past series: — Psychology vs Stoicism — Time Management for Busy Mortals — Independence and Knowing Yourself — Cognitive Biases and Rational Thinking — Psychology of Connection and Relationships — Carol Dweck and the Multiverse of Mindsets — Addiction and Behaviour Change — Nervous System Mastery and Polyvagal Theory — Mental Strength and Self-Discipline