I share my current thoughts on various responses to accusations of abuse on the part of author Thando Mgqolozana (author of A Man Who Is Not A Man, Hear Me Alone, Unimportance).Some of the questions I explore include: Is it important to expres a public view when a friend is accused of abuse? Or is silence (sometimes) acceptable? Should you wait for the law to "take its course" or can we make judgments outside the legal processes? Can our criminal justice system be regarded as adequate for dealing with violence? Etc.