No Apology Needed: why vulnerably sharing doesn't require require an apology or change
As we began to practice vulnerably sharing our hearts with each other, we found that we often ran into trouble when the listener would get defensive. So we started asking ourselves, what is it about the way I'm sharing my feelings that puts them on the defense? We found defensiveness shows up strongest for these reasons: Sometimes our "feelings" (read: emotions), are really disguised opinions, judgments or blame. For example, "I feel disrespected" is first of all, not an emotion at all, but...