The Upside of Our Parents' Divorce

What’s the secret to sibling success? Apparently, an ugly divorce. At least, that’s how it went down for Ellen Umansky and her two brothers. Ellen’s parents separated when she was 9. “They loved us deeply, but there were battles to be won — emotional, reputational, financial,” Ellen wrote in her Modern Love essay. As Ellen and her brothers were flung into a new reality of parental feuds and convoluted calendar arrangements, her brothers became her “one constant and comfort.” Today’s episode is about “Team Umansky,” as Ellen’s husband calls them, a unit that has stuck together from adolescence through adulthood.

Om Podcasten

For 20 years, the Modern Love column has given New York Times readers a glimpse into the complicated love lives of real people. Since its start, the column has evolved into a TV show, three books and a podcast. Each week, host Anna Martin brings you stories and conversations about love in all its glorious permutations, dumb pitfalls and life-changing moments. New episodes every Wednesday. Listen to this podcast in New York Times Audio, our new iOS app for news subscribers. Download now at nytimes.com/audioapp