In this session, I'll be talking about authority, both how we exercise authority, and how we experience it, and how certain institutions are set up to give us certain qualities of authority. nonviolent communication suggest that we get certain things clear when we're in a position of authority or when we're dealing with people in positions of authority.
Some very important differentiations. One of these is the difference between respect for authority and fear of authority. Getting these mixed up creates a great deal of pain for people is I would use these terms. respect for authority involves three ingredients.
When we're in a position of authority, we get respect for our authority. When one we know some things or can do some things that the people we're working with, or living with, do not have. Second things people see these things that we know or can do. They see them as valuable. They see how these things will enrich their lives. And third, they see us as offering these things which we know that are valuable. We offer we don't impose them.
Respect for authority as I use the term is manifest when we know things that people don't know, or can do things that they don't know how to do. They see that these things are very valuable and they see that these things are being offered to them and not imposed upon them, then they would have what I call respect for authority.
Now, fear of authority is quite a different thing that is usually built into the structure of either the family, the school, the business, the government. This structure gives us the right to impose things on people that we can reward or punish, to get people to do what we want. So respect for authority needs to be earned. We need to clearly communicate with people so they can see the value of what we're offering.
Nonviolent communication is a process that consists of an intention to contribute to our own well being, and the well being of others, compassionately. So that whatever we do is done willingly, not done out of guilt, or shame, or fear of punishment, or trying to buy love, by submitting to what we think others expect us to do. That we give solely out of the joy that comes naturally from contributing to life. Our own life and the lives of others.