episode eighty-seven: Why does the mustard matter?

Remember those days, hanging out at the mall, thinking Spencer's Gifts was the height of counter-culture because they had festive roach clips? Yeah, me neither. I spent all my time at Waldenbooks. Anyway, get ready for a trip backwards in time to the mall. I can almost smell the Orange Julius and Cinnabon (which reminded me that I made coffee that was currently cooling in the other room, dammit. I'm back now) and hear the yelps as another pre-teen gets their ears pierced at Claire's. There's a very confused security guard -slash-sommelier, some moaning, and somebody ends up with an earring in their forehead. (Now taking bets on who THAT turns out to be.) Because you haven't got the sense nature gave a goat, you're listening to: Chrisi Talyn Saje as Julie Sarah Rhea Werner as Pipistrelle Eric Perry as Joe Aaron Clark as Le Bichon Frise Shannon Perry as Madeline and Olivia Lee Shackleford as Pluto introducing the Narrator's kiddo, Michaela Nadolny Gourley as Emma, the Counter Girl and John Dowgin of Mission: Rejected as Cyril the Security Guy. Kyle Jones is Narrator Two, and Chris Nadolny Gourley is your Narrator Our music is composed and performed by John Faley; Lucas Elliott creates our artwork. Sarah Golding is our dialogue editor, and Chrisi Talyn Saje is our sound designer. Oz 9 is written by Shannon Perry. Oz 9 is a proud member of the Fable & Folly network! Please support our partners here: https://fableandfolly.com/partners/. And be sure to check out the other great Fable & Folly shows at https://fableandfolly.com/. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Om Podcasten

It's Spring 2142 (a Tuesday), and Gated Galaxies has launched its 400 Oz-8000 ships, each carrying 50,000 "resting guests" to, hopefully, a new home on a shiny, brand-new planet. Except this whole "terraform and take over" idea isn't actually the plan; the real plan is far more nefarious and involves a great deal of cackling. But those aboard the ships don't know that, so off they toodle (those that make it out of Earth's atmosphere, at least), all shiny and optimistic. This is the story of one of those ships – the Oz 9 – and its tiny crew of hopeless incompetents. So far, they've been in space half an hour and several hundred people are dead. So... bright future, clearly.