TLP394: Calmness and Charisma with Dr. Benjamin Ritter
Dr. Benjamin Ritter, founder of Live for Yourself Consulting, emphasizes the importance of humor in public speaking and maintaining a balance between calmness and charisma. He highlights the significance of standing out in leadership and embracing awkward situations to build confidence. Ben defines executive presence through three pillars: vision, credibility, and presence, and links it to a filtered level of emotional intelligence, focusing on authenticity and adaptation to organizational norms. He discusses building positive relationships, adapting, and situational leadership within organizations. Sharing his journey of overcoming social awkwardness, Ben contrasts this with his clients' fears and stresses the importance of identifying and addressing client pain points. He gives practical advice on personal development, such as minimizing media consumption and focusing on impactful content. Lastly, he advises employees to seek regular one-on-one meetings with leaders and suggests that job candidates inquire about a company's current focus during interviews. Key Takeaways: [02:21] Dr. Ben shares the importance of humor when speaking in front of the crowd. He also stated that it is important to maintain calmness while giving value to charisma in their professional life. Dr. Ben discusses his adaptability in soccer, being a "Swiss army knife”, praising adaptability but stresses the importance of standing out and occasionally being unconventional for leadership development. He also talked about the idea of intentionally embracing awkward situations to build confidence. [05:40] He discusses clients seeking to develop executive presence for success. Dr. Ben stresses the importance of defining it based on organizational expectations. Executive presence is broken down into three pillars: vision, credibility, and presence. These encompass actions, speech, and appearance. He also explains that executive presence is a filtered level of emotional intelligence, emphasizing authenticity while adapting to organizational expectations. He also mentions the importance of building positive relationships, adapting, and situationally leading within an organization. [12:35] Dr. Ben defines executive presence as the ability to influence and persuade without authority. He also discusses qualities of effective sports team captains, emphasizing the importance of quiet yet commanding composure and leading by example. Dr. Ben also mentions an article on self-leadership, where clarity is identified as the first pillar, crucial for avoiding feeling lost and achieving intentional goals. [20:35] He shares about personal growth, recounting how overcoming social awkwardness involved intentionally facing discomfort. Dr. Ben contrasts his experiences with clients who fear basic actions. He emphasizes the significance of identifying pain points, connecting with clients, and leading them towards beneficial solutions. Dr. Ben also mentions the importance of sales, especially for those looking to build side businesses. [25:55] Dr. Ben emphasizes the importance of effective self-promotion, linking it to self-belief. Discomfort with self-promotion often stems from a lack of confidence in one's own value. He also exchanges lessons learned with Jim and Jan from hosting podcasts, including the realization that alcohol impairs podcast quality and the discovery of personal speech fillers during editing. Dr. Ben believes that famous individuals often have less interesting talk tracks, while real gems come from everyday stories. [30:03] He offers practical advice on learning and personal development, like reducing media intake and focusing on impactful content repeatedly. Dr. Ben talks about the challenge of remembering key information and stresses the value of embedding learned concepts into daily life. Organizations prioritizing employee satisfaction only during prosperous times and suggests the need for improved metrics. Dr. Ben advocates for a shift in perspective, with employees taking a more proactive role in their careers and organizations creating environments conducive to employee engagement. [31:58] Dr. Ben emphasizes the employee's role in engagement, encouraging them to demand one-on-one meetings with leaders. In interviews, candidates should inquire about a company's current focus or what they are trying to address. Dr. Ben's clients seek the freedom to actively pursue their career ideas, challenging the perception that employees can't authentically show up at work. [36:08] Closing Quote: Remember, if you don't stick to your values when they're being tested, they're not values, they're hobbies. -John Stewart Quotable Quotes: “If you're trying to become a leader, make sure you turn that charisma on all the time.” “It's also important to stand out and to not always be the one that is following the lead and instead to help people be the leader.” “Let's figure out how to have a conversation with your manager to define what their expectations are.” “It's about creating alignment, being a champion and an advocate for the organization while also building a brand.” “Credibility is a combination of your skills.” “It's like being a leader without having, you don't need authority to be that leader.” “Self-leadership is the only true leadership in the world.” “The most important leader in your life is you” “No matter how incredible a leader you are, the people that you're supposedly leading are ultimately the ones making the decision.” “Without clarity, you tend to see people getting stuck, feeling lost, doubting themselves, investing in things that aren't really where they want to go.” “Don't drink alcohol and do podcasts. You think you're funny, but you're not.” “The most famous people with their talk track are the least interesting people to talk to, and that the real stories are where the real gems are.” “No matter what someone's story is, it tends to come down to a lot of the same things.” “If you find one book that makes a difference, read that book consistently until it stops making a difference.” “An organization should be an environment where employees can successfully engage towards their interests.” “If you were in an interview, your job is to ask enough questions to figure out what they're looking for and what they're trying to solve.” Resources Mentioned: The Leadership Podcast | Sponsored by | Rafti Advisors. LLC | Self-Reliant Leadership. LLC | Dr. Ben Ritter Website | Dr. Ben Ritter LinkedIn | Dr. Ben Ritter Twitter | Dr. Ben Ritter Instagram |