TPJ 57: Interview with Renee Jain of GoZen!

Hi friend! Do your kids ever get angry or throw tantrums? Do YOU ever get triggered by their tantrums and lose it? 

🙋🏻‍♀️I do. We all do.

In this episode you’ll get to hear from the amazing Renee Jain of GoZen as we discuss how to “handle” emotions in both our children AND in ourselves. 

[05:37] What is GoZen in a nutshell?

[09:20] We have to make peace with the idea that stress and difficulties are a part of our humanity.

[09:42] Feelings aren't good or bad. They're neutral.

[11:24] Create a character (a name) for each emotion (such as “Fury” for anger).

[14:30] Emotions come and go. They're not permanent.

[14:44] We need to have a relationship with the [seemingly negative] emotion and see the upsides.

[19:23] Anger/fury usually pops up for protection, or when boundaries have been crossed.

[22:10] Don't try to teach your children things "in the moment." 

[22:48] We need to model what it looks like and stop trying to control our children’s emotions. 

[27:28] In those moments, try putting on your detective hat.

[31:24] Play is so important, even when they're throwing angry tantrums.

[32:51] Progress should be measured in years, not days. 

[34:44] Practice or role play (outside of the moment) to teach them how they can respond differently when they're in the moment. 

[41:21] It's a marathon, not a sprint.

[44:52] We can't be afraid of feelings and try to always suppress and control them. 

[48:26] Get a stuffed animal for each of the 4 main emotions and use them for role play.

The work never really ends, but if we’ll remember that progress is measured in years and not days, that it’s a marathon and not a sprint, and implement some of the tips that Renee mentions, we’ll start to see some lasting change in ourselves and in our children. 

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Welcome to Hi, Fam! Learn how to blend ancient wisdom with modern living to design a family life you love. Your host, Avital (pronounced Ah-Vee-Tal), is a designer, parenting coach, and mother of five on a mission to guide parents to build unbreakable homes, create passionate marriages, and raise resilient kids. Tune in weekly for no-nonsense myth-busting, tough love, fascinating conversations, and deep dives into controversial subjects. Learn more at hifam.com