TPJ 62: Setting Up Your [Big or Small] Space For Independent Play

I get messages from parents all over the world (hundreds a day) asking how they can get their kids to play independently. 

I hear things like:

  • My kids won’t play
  • My kids are clingy
  • We live in a small apartment
  • My kids have very different play styles
  • My kids fight with each other
  • I’m a working parent, so it can’t work for me

I’m here to tell you that those are just excuses! And to help you see that your kids are capable of independent play, I wanted to share some stories from a few of my “Present Players”.

[01:14] No matter how out of control life may feel, there are always things we can control.

[06:10] Independent play is a skill that can be developed

[07:56] Independent play has incredible benefits for our children.

[08:55] You don't need to buy anything. You'll likely even get rid of some things. 

[11:17] Hear how Elizabeth learned to prioritize play, and accommodate 2 very different styles of play for her children.

[12:46] “Strewing changed my life...It's like magic.”

[15:34] She found that each of her kids have different play needs, and does what she can to encourage and protect that.

[16:18] Hear Galina's story about how she set up her zones in a tiny New York apartment.

[17:18] Overwhelmed in her small apartment with too many toys.

[18:48] Even though she has a small apartment, she has found a way to set up all of her play zones.

[21:07] “I wasn't sure if my child could play independently because he was clingy.”

[23:59] Don't let excuses get in the way! If Galina can make it work, you can make it work too!

[25:11] Melissa didn't know how to organize life in the midst of chaos.

[26:01] You don't have to do everything at once

[26:10] Make sure the structure of the space makes sense for the intent of the space.

[26:31] Even in quarantine (with 6 people in a 3 bedroom house), she was able to set up a space for school work without affecting her existing play spaces.

[27:18] It eased the transition to homeschooling

[29:06] Hear Victoria's story, and how she's able to "parent from work" and direct her son's play, even when she can't be home with him. 

[30:40] You can set up your home with small changes, using things you already own.

[31:18] Is it relevant for a 10 month old? Yes, and he's morphed into an independent play toddler.

[31:35] Has allowed her to set up her caretakers (and son) for success by strewing and designing his play areas.

Whether you have lots of space and access to the outdoors or you live in a small apartment with no outside space, you can design your home in a way that encourages independent play. Whether you’re a full-time caretaker or work full-time, Present Play will help you set your kids up for [independent play] success.  

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Welcome to Hi, Fam! Learn how to blend ancient wisdom with modern living to design a family life you love. Your host, Avital (pronounced Ah-Vee-Tal), is a designer, parenting coach, and mother of five on a mission to guide parents to build unbreakable homes, create passionate marriages, and raise resilient kids. Tune in weekly for no-nonsense myth-busting, tough love, fascinating conversations, and deep dives into controversial subjects. Learn more at hifam.com