026: The Right Balance of Freedoms & Limits

Children need both, freedoms and limits. Freedoms without limits create chaos. But too many limits lead to unmet needs. How do we get this right?   It can be tricky to navigate the new way we build relationships with our children, especially as we become more aware of their rights and needs. So is it OK to say “no” to your child and how many times? How to stay clear of overindulging? The right balance of both freedoms and limits not only helps our child develop, it also builds our relationship with them.  Freedoms without limits create chaos in the families and anxiety for children. Too many limits with barely any freedoms leads to unmet needs. When the child’s needs are not met they either withdraw or become aggressive. It is important to get a balance of both.   What does the right balance look like?   Think "reasonable" and you will be on the  right path. The balance is built on the needs of the child and the needs of those around the child. Your child does have a human right to getting their needs met, and so when it comes to their needs, it is wise to say yes and to allow for conditions that will meet that need.   We are not setting limits on our children’s needs. We only set limits on their wants — the way they want something to happen is negotiable. We are in charge of that.     Sign up here for the Emotionally Intelligent Parenting training.   Host: Julia Pappas, Psychologist & Parent Coach More info at theparentingpresence.com        

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The "parenting presence" is the inner strength and gentle wisdom available to any parent who is willing to spend time to get to know themselves. Parents who learn how their own emotional regulation works, how their needs are met, and how actions are guided by thoughts and interpretations — also discover an amazing source of influence and guidance available to them in parenting. Why? Because when parents know the rhythms of their own inner workings, they are also able to discover what makes their child tick. We have many questions when it comes to parenting and just about everywhere we turn – someone’s got the answer! But how do you tease out what really matters? The PARENTING PRESENCE framework is your guide to parenting essentials and it consists of THREE CORE ELEMENTS. It is based on simple principles of child development and incorporates deep personal values everyone holds as a parent. This is a podcast about the most essential parenting skills we need in order to raise children with confidence and intention. Isn’t it so much better to know with certainty what to do, rather than follow random advice? Exactly! Join Julia Pappas, Psychologist and Parent Coach, on the mission towards informed parenting simplicity. What to do when children have strong emotions? What if the child’s behavior is out of control? How to manage our own anger and frustration? Find answers to your burning questions and get strategies that work today and bring maximum impact for long-term sustainable relationship with your children. For show notes, downloadable parenting resources, and more information, please explore each episode.