Facing the Inner Critic: Moving from Shame to Vulnerability

In this episode, Drew, the avoidant partner in his relationship with Melissa, begins to confront his deep-seated feelings of inadequacy and shame. Drew's inner critic, which has driven him to seek perfection and self-improvement, also caused emotional pain and isolation. As he starts to unravel these complex feelings, he struggles to articulate them but makes significant progress in acknowledging their impact on his life and relationship. Julie’s guidance helps Drew understand that these negative beliefs don’t define him and encourages him to be vulnerable, even if it’s not perfectly expressed. This shift is crucial for Drew, who has often avoided confronting these emotions. Melissa’s empathetic response underscores the importance of mutual support and understanding in a relationship. Their interaction highlights a move from old patterns of avoidance and self-criticism to a more connected and secure relationship. Have you ever faced challenges with vulnerability in your relationship, especially as an avoidant partner? How might addressing these deep-seated feelings impact your connection with others? This episode offers insights into transforming avoidance into meaningful emotional engagement. Follow Julie Menanno on social media @thesecurerelationship. For weekly homework assignments visit Julie's website: The Secure Relationship Purchase Julie's book Secure Love: Create a Relationship That Lasts a Lifetime

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Welcome to The Secure Love Podcast: Real Time Couples Therapy with Julie Menanno. Julie Menanno is a licensed therapist dedicated to helping couples build secure, lasting connections using Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT). In each episode, Julie works with a real couple in their 30s, Melissa and Drew, and just like many of us, they are navigating life's challenges, raising kids, managing busy careers, and working on their relationship. Join us to explore the depths of attachment theory and its profound impact on our relationships. We'll identify negative communication cycles and learn how to create positive, lasting changes. By sharing Melissa and Drew's journey, you'll gain relatable insights and actionable steps to apply in your own life. Each episode offers practical skills and homework assignments to help you foster a more secure and fulfilling connection with your partner. The Secure Love Podcast is your companion for building healthier, happier relationships. Your journey to a more secure love begins now.