Ask Margaret: My Kid Keeps Running Away!

If you've ever had a child bolt from you in a parking lot or at preschool drop-off, you know it can be a scary experience. Today's question comes from email (questions@whatfreshhellpodcast.com): I am a mother of 4-year-old twins, a boy and a girl. In the past six months my daughter has been running out to the car, not listening to me when I ask her to walk with me or when I say "stop." I'm always asking both my kids to "stop" and "come back." It became almost a dangerous situation for us just yesterday when my daughter just kept running through the parking lot during school pickup. She thought it was a game and began giggling when I yelled "Come back!" I was partly terrified and partly so angry. I love my kids to the moon and back, and I know part of this is four-year-old boundary-testing, but my job as a parent is to keep them safe. How can I teach and motivate my kids to walk with me and not to run ahead? Sometimes when we are reactive to our kids' behavior – like when we yell out because we are terrified of them running into the street – they find it hilarious. The solution? Find a special word that you can use calmly in these situations. Margaret offers the example "red light." In a calmer moment, explain to your child that running away is dangerous and against the rules. Tell them that you have a special word like "red light," and when they hear "red light" they must freeze. They are not allowed to move again without your permission. Practice this, and remind them when heading anywhere that you expect them to stay still if you say it. Then when your child takes off, say "red light," and try to keep the emotion out of it, which can be tough. Then, if the child keeps running it is time for immediate consequences, whether that means returning to the car to "try again," or leaving the activity altogether. A few stern and consistent "red light" reminders should make a big difference in your child's behavior. Check out this article by Corinna Vangerwen for Today's Parent: 5 ways to get your preschooler to stop running away from you Special thanks to our sponsor, Pampers: For trusted protection, choose Pampers, the #1 Pediatrician Recommended Brand. Download the Pampers Club App today to start earning free diapers. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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When you're a parent, every day brings a "fresh hell" to deal with. In other words, there's always something. Think of us as your funny mom friends who are here to remind you: you're not alone, and it won't always be this hard. We're Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables, both busy moms of three kids, but with completely different parenting styles. Margaret is a laid-back to the max; Amy never met a spreadsheet or an organizational system she didn't like. In each episode of "What Fresh Hell" we offer lots of laughs, but also practical advice, parenting strategies, and tips to empower you in your role as a mom. We explore self-help techniques, as well as ways to prioritize your own needs, combat stress, and despite the invisible workload we all deal with, find joy amidst the chaos of motherhood. If you've ever wondered "why is my kid..." then one of us has probably been there, and we're here to tell you what we've learned along the way. We unpack the behaviors and developmental stages of toddlers, tweens, and teenagers, providing insights into their actions and equipping you with effective parenting strategies. We offer our best parenting tips and skills we've learned. We debate the techniques and studies that are everywhere for parents these days, and get to the bottom of what works best to raise happy, healthy, fairly well-behaved kids, while fostering a positive parent-child relationship. If you're the default parent in your household, whether you're a busy mom juggling multiple pickups and dropoffs, or a first-time parent seeking guidance, this podcast is your trusted resource. Join our community of supportive mom friends laughing in the face of motherhood!   whatfreshhellpodcast.com