When Can We Start Saying Yes?

Vaccines. Mandate-liftings. Scaled reopenings. All of these things are great and long wished for. But we were kind of thinking there'd be a bell, or something. A hard deadline. A day when we'd all dance out into the ticker-taped streets and make out with strangers in Times Square. Without a "you are now free to move about the cabin" announcement, how will we know when it's okay for grandparents to visit? To fly to that wedding? To toss our masks once and for all? When is it okay to start saying yes? Our listener Heather put it this way: I think seeing a light at the end of the tunnel can be unsettling. We've been living in this weird way for a year now. And as much as it seems crazy, we've gotten used to it. Psychologists call the stress this is making us feel the “third-quarter phenomenon.” For people forced to endure long stretches of isolation– astronauts, Arctic explorers, submarine sailors– the most difficult part, regardless of the length of the assignment, has been proven to be about 75% of the way through, precisely when the end of the assignment first comes into distant focus. As things start to open up and some of us don't feel ready, or wonder if the world is ready, it's a new source of stress that we were saved from when we were all apart. Past scientists and astronauts who suffered from the “third-quarter phenomenon" were advised to refocus on their mission- why they were doing what they were doing, and the great worth of seeing it through. Seems like great advice for the rest of us. Focusing on the mission might be what will get us through this last part of the tunnel. Here are links to writing on the topic that we discuss in this episode: Tara Law for Time: We're in the Third Quarter of the Pandemic. Antarctic Researchers, Mars Simulation Scientists and Navy Submarine Officers Have Advice For How to Get Through It Robert Bechtel and Amy Berning: The Third-Quarter Phenomenon: Do People Experience Discomfort After Stress Has Passed? Nathan Smith: The third-quarter phenomenon: the psychology of time in space "Beautiful City" from Godspell (1973) "Brand New Day" from The Wiz (1978) @neilochka on Instagram * Leave us a rating or review in your favorite podcast app! * Join us on Facebook: https://facebook.com/whatfreshhellcast * Instagram: https://instagram.com/whatfreshhellcast * YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/WhatFreshHellPodcast * Pinterest: https://pinterest.com/whatfreshhellcast * Twitter: https://twitter.com/WFHpodcast * questions and feedback: info@whatfreshhellpodcast.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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When you're a parent, every day brings a "fresh hell" to deal with. In other words, there's always something. Think of us as your funny mom friends who are here to remind you: you're not alone, and it won't always be this hard. We're Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables, both busy moms of three kids, but with completely different parenting styles. Margaret is a laid-back to the max; Amy never met a spreadsheet or an organizational system she didn't like. In each episode of "What Fresh Hell" we offer lots of laughs, but also practical advice, parenting strategies, and tips to empower you in your role as a mom. We explore self-help techniques, as well as ways to prioritize your own needs, combat stress, and despite the invisible workload we all deal with, find joy amidst the chaos of motherhood. If you've ever wondered "why is my kid..." then one of us has probably been there, and we're here to tell you what we've learned along the way. We unpack the behaviors and developmental stages of toddlers, tweens, and teenagers, providing insights into their actions and equipping you with effective parenting strategies. We offer our best parenting tips and skills we've learned. We debate the techniques and studies that are everywhere for parents these days, and get to the bottom of what works best to raise happy, healthy, fairly well-behaved kids, while fostering a positive parent-child relationship. If you're the default parent in your household, whether you're a busy mom juggling multiple pickups and dropoffs, or a first-time parent seeking guidance, this podcast is your trusted resource. Join our community of supportive mom friends laughing in the face of motherhood!   whatfreshhellpodcast.com